Hey, vidalia onions? Fuck you.
You're all like, "Heyyyy, look at meeee, I am sooo nice. I am not oniony AT ALL." Well, y'know what? You're an onion -- be an onion!
"But I'm so sweet!"
If I want sweet, I will eat an apple dipped in powdered sugar. Your motto should be: Vidalias. The onion for people who do not like onions. You are like a ball of white bread.
"That's okay. You can call me that. I'm so nice and accommodating."
Vidalia onions, you have no self-respect. It's just sad.
Sincerely,
Jordan
P.S. If you want to know how an onion should behave, white onions are where it's at. You could learn a lot from white onions.
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